Do you want the short answer? Here it is…Yes.
Winning is important… but not for the reasons that most people think. Let me ask you, “What is your relationship with the concept of winning?”
Sports are a metaphor for life…
… and if a person doesn’t learn what it takes to win through competition and sports, it is very likely that they will struggle to learn it in other ways throughout their life. The idea of “Winning” is not without controversy. It is a concept that many people have deeply held beliefs around, often to the detriment of the people they are trying to develop… their players.
The 3 Faces of Winning
There seem to be three reactions to the topic of “winning”; not counting Charlie Sheen’s “approach”, which we won’t be addressing.
First, there is the “winning at all costs” camp which justifies all kinds of reprehensible and sometimes immoral or even illegal behavior in the “pursuit of winning”. Eventually though, these people are removed from their positions of authority because their behavior is not tolerated by their players, parents and their organizations.
On the other hand…
On the other (second) side of “winning” are the people who feel “everyone is a winner” and their downfall is that as they pass out trophies for everyone, they create youngsters who feel entitled to win at everything they do. Sadly, these kids will either be disappointed when they realize that the real world doesn’t work that way or they will simply give up without putting in any serious effort. This philosophy of “winning” takes away the reward for effort and improvement and cripples kids chances of achieving their dreams in the future.
Another way to look at this is through Carol Dweck’s framework from her book titled “Mindset”. She explains the difference between a “growth mindset” where a loss is simply feedback for future growth versus a “fixed mindset” which says that someone either has talent or they do not so any loss indicates a lack of talent and there is no reason to pursue future challenges in that area.
And this one is “Just Right”…
The third approach to winning, and the one that I support, leverages the challenges offered by competitive sports so that players discover what they might be capable through a sustained effort and focus. It is firmly planted in the “Growth Mindset”. I like to say, “Winning is a byproduct. It is what happens when proper preparation meets productive attitude.”
Sport is a unique opportunity for players to learn lessons not easily acquired in other ways. My teams pick up things like “How to work together as a team toward a common goal”, “How to push past discomfort to improve your physical conditioning”, and “How to ‘Master the Mundane*’ tasks that are part of repetitive drills that yield improved game skills.”
* “Master the Mundane” is a phrase I picked up when I interviewed Tom Brayshaw, the 1989 New Hampshire Player-of-the-Year and 2117 point career high school scorer.
The action of a game enhances a player’s ability to focus – identifying opportunities and reacting quickly to developing situations on the court or field of play.
This third view of winning, at least the way I see it, also treats losing a bit differently from the way the general public sees it. I tell my teams that they will never lose… if they can learn from every contest where they do not come out on top at the end of the game. I call it “Win or Learn” vs. “Win or Lose” and it is a way of turning every contest, regardless of outcome, into one more step in the process of ultimate winning… becoming the best that you, and your team, can be.
This also makes it easier to adopt an attitude of good sportsmanship since your competitor is not the enemy. They are simply the team or player(s) that are committed to bringing out the best that you have and identifying your weaknesses. It is hard to be mad at someone who is doing their best … to make you better !
Don’t Cheat your players out of a winning mindset !
While it probably doesn’t warrant a 4th view of winning by itself, I often see coaches who settle for “good enough” rather than holding their players and team to a higher standard. A standard that is focused on becoming the best and winning much more often than not.
Maybe coaching is not that important to these coaches. Maybe no one ever taught them what it means to be a winner so they can’t pass those ideas on to their team. I am not blaming them. There are many reasons why it happens and, sadly, many parents or school administrators simply let it continue. As Jim Collins says in his book, “Good to Great”, sometimes “Good is the enemy of Great”. If you are happy with “good enough” it is very easy to stop there and not pursue excellence.
Whatever the reason, coaches who settle for “good enough” are cheating their players out of critical life lessons that the pursuit of winning in sports could provide.
Agree? Disagree?
Oversimplified? Too Complicated?
Too Much? Not enough?
Leave a comment below. The only rule for comments is “Remember The Fonz”… be cool (and respectful).
Next article…
“How do you create an environment for winning?”
Do you want to know the mental framework that I use as the foundation for creating a winning team, even at the middle school level? What gets players motivated to push themselves and perform at their best? I will address these questions in my next article
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