December 2024 - Building a Winning Mindset

Mistakes: Your Key to Winning

Mistakes are often seen as setbacks, failures, or embarrassments, but for those with a winning mindset, they are stepping stones to success. They are lessons wrapped in challenges, teaching us what doesn’t work and pushing us closer to what does.

Mistakes are an inevitable part of life, especially when striving for greatness, and learning to recognize, move past, and grow from them is crucial to building a winning mindset. Let’s explore how to turn mistakes—both chronic and one-time—into powerful tools for improvement.

Recognizing Mistakes, Especially Chronic Ones

The first step to learning from mistakes is recognizing them. This might sound simple, but it can be surprisingly difficult, especially when dealing with habitual or chronic errors. These are the mistakes we make repeatedly, often without realizing it, because they are tied to ingrained patterns of thought or behavior.

Spotting Chronic Mistakes

Self-Reflection: Take time to regularly reflect on your actions, decisions, and results. Journaling or maintaining a simple log of daily experiences can help you identify patterns of behavior that lead to repeated errors.
Feedback from Others: Sometimes, chronic mistakes are easier to spot when others point them out. Surround yourself with people who aren’t afraid to offer constructive criticism and value their input.
Objective Analysis: Look at your performance metrics. In basketball, for example, a coach might track turnovers or missed opportunities to identify recurring problems.

The Emotional Blind Spot

One reason mistakes go unnoticed is that we tend to justify them emotionally. We might blame circumstances, other people, or bad luck instead of admitting our own role in the outcome. A winning mindset requires humility—the ability to set aside ego and take full ownership of our actions.

Ask yourself:

What am I consistently doing that’s not working?
If I were advising someone else, what would I tell them about this behavior?
How can I approach this differently?

By recognizing your mistakes—especially the chronic ones—you take the first critical step in turning them into growth opportunities.

Moving Past Mistakes:
Overcoming the “Sucked-In Effect“

It’s easy to get sucked into mistakes, letting them define you or derail your progress. Dwelling on them leads to fear, doubt, and hesitation, which can prevent you from taking the next step. A winning mindset involves acknowledging mistakes without letting them consume you.

1. Acknowledge The Mistake, Don’t Avoid It

When a mistake happens, acknowledge it immediately. Avoiding or ignoring it only magnifies its impact. Own it, name it, and accept it as part of the process.

Mindfulness is a key part of recognizing and acknowledging a mistake. Here is an article if you want to learn more about how Mindfulness is related to Mistakes.

Key Mindset Shift:
Mistakes are not the opposite of success…
they are part of the journey toward Success.

2. Avoid Overthinking

Dwelling on a mistake can spiral into overthinking, which hinders progress. Instead of ruminating, ask:

What can I learn from this?
What will I do differently next time?

Focus on solutions, not problems. For example, if you miss a critical free throw in a basketball game, dwelling on it won’t change the outcome. Instead, commit to extra practice and visualization techniques to improve next time.

3. Use Mistakes as Motivation

Instead of letting a mistake discourage you, let it fire you up. Channel the frustration into action. Many athletes and successful individuals have used their greatest setbacks as fuel to prove themselves.

4. Create a Reset Ritual

Develop a ritual to help you move past mistakes quickly. This might include deep breathing, repeating a mantra, or taking a moment to visualize success. For example, some basketball players tap their chest and point upward as a way of saying, “That’s on me, and I’m moving forward.” There is a softball team that uses the gesture simulating the flushing of a toilet as a way to show that they are letting go of their mistake and sending it down the drain.

Incorporating these practices into your life, or something similar of your own design, ensures that mistakes are temporary detours, not dead ends. Learn from them and let them go.

Growing from Mistakes

Once you’ve recognized and moved past your mistakes, the final and most important step is to grow from them. Growth involves turning every error into a learning opportunity and using it to improve your future performance.

1. Learn the Lesson

Every mistake carries a lesson, but you have to look for it. Ask yourself:

What went wrong?
Why did it happen?
What could I have done differently?
How can I prevent this in the future?

Be specific. For example, if your basketball team lost a game because of poor communication on defense, analyze the breakdown and implement drills to improve teamwork.

2. Embrace Feedback

Feedback is a gift, even when it’s hard to hear. Seek out coaches, mentors, or teammates who can provide insights into your mistakes and how to address them. The more open you are to feedback, the faster you’ll grow.

3. Develop New Habits

Chronic mistakes often stem from bad habits. To grow, you must replace these with better habits. Bad habits don’t go away by themselves. If you try to stop, a “vacuum” is created and something worse might slide in to replace the bad habit. Create a new habit that pushes the old out for good.

Start small: Focus on one habit at a time.
Be consistent: Change happens through repetition. As NBA player Chris Paul says, “Stack the reps“.
Track progress: Celebrate small wins to stay motivated.

For example, if you habitually rush your shots, create a pre-shot routine to slow yourself down and improve accuracy. Or work on your shot so that you can get it off more quickly… and comfortably with confidence.

4. Stay Positive

Growth requires a positive mindset. Be kind to yourself. Mistakes don’t define you; how you respond to them does. Focus on your progress and remember that setbacks are temporary.

Mental Growth Example:
Michael Jordan, one of the greatest basketball players of all time, famously said, “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times, I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Mistakes / Team Dynamics

Mistakes don’t just happen individually; they happen within teams. A winning mindset involves creating a culture where mistakes are seen as opportunities for collective growth rather than reasons for blame. Everyone contributes to the team… and everyone makes mistakes at some point. It is part of the process and the stronger teams understand how to deal with mistakes productively.

Foster Open Communication

Encourage team members to admit mistakes without fear of judgment. This builds trust and ensures that mistakes are addressed, not hidden.

Collaborative Problem-Solving

When a mistake affects the team, involve everyone in finding solutions. For example, if a basketball team struggles with turnovers, brainstorm strategies together to reduce them.

Celebrate Growth

Recognize and celebrate when a teammate learns from a mistake and improves. This reinforces the idea that mistakes are part of the journey to success.

The Winning Mindset & Mistakes

Coach Wheeler helps you Build a Winning Mindset

I have made plenty of mistakes. (Check out the following article if you don’t believe me.) I firmly believe that mistakes are not failures; they are opportunities. They provide clarity on what doesn’t work and pave the way for what does.

By recognizing mistakes—especially habitual ones—you bring them into the light, where they can be addressed. By moving past them quickly, you prevent them from holding you back. And by growing from them, you transform setbacks into stepping stones toward success.

Key Takeaways as part of a Winning Mindset:

Recognize mistakes: Own your actions and identify patterns.
Move past mistakes: Avoid the trap of overthinking or dwelling on errors.
Grow from mistakes: Use every failure as an opportunity to improve.
Foster a growth culture: In teams, create an environment where mistakes are learning tools, not sources of blame.

Mistakes are not the enemy. They are your coach, your teacher, and sometimes your greatest ally in building a winning mindset. Next time you make a mistake, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, smile, reset, and remember: every mistake is another step toward becoming a winner.

Chris Paul’s Success Mindset

Put in the Reps: How to Remove Doubt and Build a Winning Mindset

If you’re serious about success—on the court, in your career, or in life—you’ve got to watch this video from Chris Paul. In it, he delivers simple yet powerful advice that resonates far beyond basketball:

“Reps remove doubt.”
“Keep stacking days.”
“Everything you want is on the other side of hard.”

For those of you reading this and striving to achieve greatness, this isn’t just basketball advice; this is life advice. As a coach, I’ve seen firsthand the difference these ideas make—not just in the game but in how players (and people) approach challenges, obstacles, and opportunities.

Let’s break these ideas down and see how you can apply them to develop your own winning mindset.

Reps Remove Doubt

When I hear Chris Paul say, “Reps remove doubt,” it immediately takes me back to the practice court. I’ve seen so many players struggle with self-confidence in high-pressure situations. The truth is, doubt creeps in when you’re not prepared. And the only way to prepare? Reps.

Think about this: Have you ever hesitated in a game—second-guessed your shot, overthought a pass, or doubted your ability to defend? That hesitation comes from uncertainty. Uncertainty comes from a lack of preparation. Repetition is the antidote.

Why Reps Matter

Repetition builds muscle memory. It makes your actions automatic. When you’ve taken 1,000 shots in practice, shooting in a game isn’t a question—it’s second nature. The same goes for anything in life. Whether it’s public speaking, negotiating a deal, or learning a new skill, the more you do something, the less room there is for doubt.

Practical Application:

Start Small, But Start Daily. Begin with 10 minutes a day focusing on a specific skill. For basketball players, it might be free throws. For others, it could be writing or practicing a presentation.
Track Your Reps. Keep a journal. Log every shot, every page written, every rep completed. Progress over time is what eliminates fear.

Coach Wheeler’s Challenge: Commit to putting in 100 extra reps this week for something that matters to you. It doesn’t have to be basketball; it could be anything you’re passionate about. Show yourself how preparation can quiet the voice of doubt.

Keep Stacking Days

One of my favorite lines from Chris Paul’s video is, “Keep stacking days.” Why? Because success isn’t one big, flashy moment. It’s the accumulation of small, consistent efforts over time. One good practice isn’t enough. One win doesn’t make a season. You’ve got to stack the good days, one on top of the other, until you’re standing on a foundation of effort so solid, it’s unshakable.

The Power of Consistency

I’ve worked with players who had all the talent in the world but couldn’t stay consistent. They’d give 110% effort one day and 50% the next. Here’s the harsh truth: inconsistency kills potential. A winning mindset isn’t built on bursts of effort; it’s built on showing up and doing the work every single day.

This concept applies beyond sports. If you’re building a business, improving your health, or working toward any long-term goal, you’ve got to stay consistent. Success is about the habits you form, not the goals you set.

Practical Application FOR A SUCCESS MINDSET: How to Stack Your Days

Define Your Non-Negotiables. What are the three things you must do every day to improve? For an athlete, it might be shooting drills, strength training, and film review. For someone else, it could be writing, networking, and brainstorming new ideas.
Set Micro Goals. Focus on getting better by just 1% every day. That’s it. Over a year, those small improvements add up to massive growth.
Celebrate the Process. Stacking days isn’t glamorous, but it’s powerful. Celebrate your ability to show up, even when the results aren’t immediately visible.

Coach Wheeler’s Takeaway: Anyone can have a good day. Winners string together good days to create momentum. The more days you stack, the harder it becomes to stop your progress.

Everything You Want Is on the Other Side of Hard

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had players come to me frustrated—wanting to quit because “it’s too hard.” Whether it’s perfecting their jump shot, making it through a tough conditioning session, or staying mentally focused through adversity, I always remind them: Everything you want is on the other side of hard.

Why Hard Is Good

Struggle is part of the process of developing a Success Mindset. In fact, I would go as far as to say “struggle is necessary”. (I even wrote an article about “The Power of Struggle Time“.) The reason something is “hard” is because it’s forcing you to grow. If it were easy, everyone would do it, and it wouldn’t be worth achieving. When Chris Paul says that everything you want is on the other side of hard, he’s reminding us that the obstacles we face are the very things that prepare us for success.

SUCCESS Mindset Shift: Embrace the Hard

Instead of avoiding challenges, welcome them. When you’re faced with something hard, remind yourself: “This is where I grow. This is where I separate myself from the pack.”

Practical Application: Conquering Hard

Break It Down. When faced with a big, intimidating goal, break it into smaller, more manageable steps. Focus on conquering one step at a time.
Stay Mentally Strong. Use affirmations or visualizations to stay positive. Picture yourself overcoming the challenge and achieving your goal.
Find Support. Surround yourself with people who push you. A coach, mentor, or teammate can make a huge difference when things get tough.

Coach Wheeler’s Take on Motivation: Hard is where greatness happens. When you feel like giving up, remember: that’s where most people stop. Push through, and you’ll find yourself in rare company—on the other side of hard.

How to Apply These Lessons to Your Life

Chris Paul’s principles—”Reps remove doubt,” “Keep stacking days,” and “Everything you want is on the other side of hard”—aren’t just motivational quotes. They’re actionable strategies for building a winning mindset. Here’s how you can start applying them today:

Choose Your Reps. Identify one area where you lack confidence. Commit to consistent, deliberate practice until doubt is replaced by skill.
Stack Your Days. Focus on creating a streak of consistent effort. Use a calendar, a journal, or even an app to track your progress. Build momentum, and don’t let yourself break the streak.
Face the Hard Stuff. Pick one challenge you’ve been avoiding because it’s “too hard.” Tackle it head-on, and notice how your confidence grows on the other side.

Some final thoughts on a Success Mindset
from Coach Wheeler

Winning is earned.
[That should be the title of my next book.]

Whether you’re chasing championships, climbing the corporate ladder, or improving yourself in any way, the process is the same: reps, consistency, and a willingness to embrace the hard. Chris Paul’s words are a reminder of this truth.

As your coach, my advice is simple: Stop looking for shortcuts. There aren’t any. The path to success isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. Start today. Put in the reps, stack your days, and face the hard. Develop a success mindset. Your future self will thank you.

The Sprint Mentality

In the Game of Life, Recognize the Race and Sprint to Win

What are your chances of winning a race if you don’t realize you’re in one? It’s a profound question, and one worth asking after watching a high school basketball game where one team seemed completely unaware they were competing. They didn’t lose because of a lack of talent but because they failed to recognize the urgency of the moment.

This isn’t just a basketball problem. It’s a life problem. Recognizing that you’re in a race and adopting a Sprint Mentality can be the difference between success and falling behind.

The Human Race: A Call to Action

Have you ever thought about why we’re called the human race? The term suggests urgency and motion. Yet, many people don’t realize they’re in the race at all. The starting gun fires, your competition takes off, and you’re left standing, unaware or unprepared. By the time you decide to move, the gap is too great.

In basketball, this looks like teams failing to transition from defense to offense with purpose. They jog up the court, pass the ball around aimlessly, and settle for poor shots. Meanwhile, their opponents sprint, attack, and score. The difference? Awareness and urgency.

Adopting a Sprint Mentality means recognizing that life’s race has started and committing to run with purpose.

Sprint Mentality: Recognizing Sprint Moments

Life, like basketball, isn’t a continuous sprint. But there are critical moments when you need to shift gears and move with everything you’ve got. In basketball, these moments often revolve around changes in possession:

Defensive rebounds: Are you pushing the ball upcourt immediately?
Steals: Are you attacking the basket before the defense can react?
Turnovers: Are you capitalizing on mistakes to create scoring opportunities?

In life, sprint moments might look like this:

Job opportunities: Being ready to seize a career-changing chance before others.
Personal growth challenges: Tackling a tough project or committing to a new habit with urgency.
Relationships: Acting quickly to express love, forgiveness, or support when it matters most.

Recognizing these moments and acting with urgency is at the heart of the Sprint Mentality.

Life Is a Relay Race

Another way to frame life is as a relay race. You’re not running alone. Whether it’s your family, coworkers, or friends, your actions affect others. The baton gets passed, and each runner’s effort impacts the team’s success.

Here’s the twist: You don’t know if you’re the first runner, the anchor, or somewhere in between. Your job is to run your leg of the race as fast and as well as you can. Jogging through your stretch doesn’t just hurt you—it hurts the team.

Adopting the Sprint Mentality means giving your all, regardless of your position. When the baton is in your hand, the race is yours to win.

How to Develop a Sprint Mentality

What separates winners from those who fall short? It’s not just talent or preparation. It’s the mindset to sprint when it matters most. Here’s how to cultivate it:

1. Practice Urgency

In your daily life, setting small, time-sensitive goals can be transformative. These goals don’t have to be monumental; even completing minor tasks within a specific timeframe helps build the habit of urgency. For instance, set a timer for tasks such as responding to emails, completing a workout, or finishing a chapter of a book. By practicing urgency in the mundane, you prepare yourself for the moments when quick action is critical.

This mindset translates into larger opportunities in life. When a significant project or opportunity arises, the habit of urgency allows you to act decisively and efficiently. You’ll no longer hesitate, waiting for perfect conditions or overanalyzing every detail. Instead, you’ll confidently take the first step, knowing that momentum often creates its own success. Practicing urgency isn’t just about speed; it’s about building trust in your ability to respond effectively when it matters most.

Here is a link to a time management / productivity resource:

Getting Things Done by David Allen

2. Visualize Key Moments

Visualization is a powerful tool for developing a Sprint Mentality. Taking time to imagine yourself in key scenarios—whether it’s delivering a crucial presentation, making a game-winning shot, or nailing an important interview—can prepare your mind for success.

This process isn’t just daydreaming; it’s a focused exercise in mental rehearsal. Close your eyes, take deep breaths, and walk yourself through every detail: the environment, your actions, and the outcome you desire. This practice helps your brain feel familiar with high-pressure situations before they even happen.

The more you visualize, the more confident and prepared you become. Athletes often use visualization to imagine themselves excelling under pressure, and the same principle applies to any area of life. Whether you’re facing a boardroom or a basketball court, visualization sharpens your ability to act with precision and poise when the time comes. It’s about mentally rehearsing success so that, when the moment arrives, you’re ready to sprint.

Here is a link to a video on visualization:

The Science of Visualization: How to Rewire Your Brain

3. Prepare for Transitions

Transitions are inevitable, both in life and on the court. Preparing for these shifts ensures that you’re ready to respond with agility and purpose. This preparation involves conditioning—both physically and mentally.

Staying physically fit and healthy gives you the energy and stamina to handle fast-paced transitions, whether that’s chasing a loose ball or seizing a sudden career opportunity. Similarly, maintaining mental sharpness through activities like meditation, problem-solving, and lifelong learning keeps you adaptable in the face of change.

Preparation also means having a plan for the unexpected. Life’s transitions often come without warning, but being proactive can make all the difference. Develop contingency plans, practice adaptability, and remind yourself that change is an opportunity for growth. When you prepare for transitions, you’re not just reacting to the moment—you’re anticipating it, ready to sprint forward while others are still hesitating.

4. Adopt a Winner’s Mindset

Adopting a winner’s mindset means viewing every situation as an opportunity to excel. It’s about cultivating a belief that success is possible, even in challenging circumstances.

Winners focus on solutions, not obstacles. They embrace setbacks as learning experiences and use them to refine their approach. This mindset requires intentional effort—reading motivational books, surrounding yourself with positive influences, and reflecting on your own growth.

Winners also understand the power of consistency. They know that success isn’t always about grand gestures but about showing up, putting in the effort, and sprinting when the moment demands it. By adopting this mindset, you’ll start to see challenges as stepping stones rather than roadblocks. When you approach life with the confidence and determination of a winner, you’re better equipped to sprint toward your goals and achieve lasting success.

Examples of Sprint Moments

Let’s consider some real-world applications of the Sprint Mentality:

In Business: Imagine a client request comes in at the last minute. The team that acts quickly to deliver quality results gains a competitive edge.
In Sports: A player who consistently pushes the pace during transitions forces opponents to scramble, creating scoring opportunities.
In Personal Life: A person who immediately pursues a newfound passion often gets further than someone who waits for the “perfect time.”

Sprint moments are everywhere. The challenge is to recognize them and respond with urgency.

The Payoff of Sprinting

Why is the Sprint Mentality so powerful?

Because most people don’t have it. They wait, hesitate, and miss opportunities. By sprinting when it matters, you gain a massive advantage—in basketball, business, and life.

Teams that embrace the Sprint Mentality dominate transitions. They rebound and push the ball before the defense sets up. They capitalize on turnovers. They’re relentless, always moving forward.

In life, individuals with the Sprint Mentality seize opportunities, respond to challenges, and achieve more in less time. They understand that success isn’t about pacing yourself—it’s about knowing when to sprint.

Closing Thoughts on The Sprint Mentality

The Sprint Mentality isn’t about running all the time. It’s about recognizing when to shift gears and giving everything you’ve got in those crucial moments.

The next time you’re on the court, at work, or facing a personal challenge, ask yourself: Am I running the race? Then run.

When it’s time to sprint, don’t hold back. That’s how you win.

Did you enjoy this article about “The Sprint Mentality”? If so, be sure to leave us a comment. You may also want to check out this article about “Speed“…
click here.

Life is Hard. Great. RU All-In?

In the grand theatre of life, every person encounters a unique blend of challenges, obstacles, and hardships. While some may view these difficulties as insurmountable barriers, others perceive them as stepping stones to greatness. This dichotomy in perspective often separates the ordinary from the extraordinary. In a world where competition is fierce and success is not handed on a silver platter, embracing the toughness of life and actively seeking out challenges can be the key to outshining your competition. The question is, are you all-in?

The Virtue of Hardship

Life is not designed to be easy. It’s a complex, intricate journey filled with ups and downs, triumphs and setbacks. Embracing this reality is the first step toward mastering the art of overcoming adversity. Hardship serves a critical purpose: it molds us, shapes our character, and fortifies our resolve. As the saying goes, “Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.” It is through facing and conquering challenges that we grow stronger, wiser, and more capable.

The Competitive Edge

When you actively seek out difficult tasks, you set yourself apart from the majority who prefer the path of least resistance. In every field, be it business, sports, academics, or personal development, those who excel are the ones who are not afraid to tackle the hardest problems. They understand that in doing so, they gain a competitive edge. By confronting and mastering difficulties, they develop unique skills, insights, and resilience that their competitors lack.

Consider the story of Sara Blakely, the founder of Spanx. Before her rise to fame, Blakely faced numerous rejections and setbacks. However, she viewed these challenges as opportunities to innovate and improve. By persevering through tough times and continuously refining her product, she ultimately created a billion-dollar business. Her success was not a result of avoiding difficulties but embracing them and using them to her advantage.

Life is Hard. Build Resilience.

Resilience is the hallmark of those who thrive despite adversity. It is the ability to bounce back from setbacks, to keep pushing forward even when the going gets tough. Building resilience requires a mindset shift. Instead of seeing difficulties as threats, see them as opportunities for growth. Every setback is a setup for a comeback.

Developing resilience involves cultivating a few key attributes:

Optimism: Maintaining a positive outlook in the face of adversity helps you stay motivated and focused on solutions rather than problems.
Adaptability: Being flexible and open to change allows you to navigate through challenges more effectively.
Perseverance: The ability to persist in the face of difficulties is crucial. It’s about keeping your eyes on the prize and not giving up, no matter how tough the journey gets.

Life is Hard. Are You All-In?

To truly excel and outshine your competition, you need to be all-in. This means committing fully to your goals and being willing to do whatever it takes to achieve them. It’s about having an unwavering dedication to your vision and a relentless drive to overcome any obstacles that stand in your way.

Commitment to Excellence

Excellence is not a destination but a continuous journey. It requires a commitment to constant improvement and a willingness to push beyond your comfort zone. To be all-in means striving for excellence in everything you do, whether it’s a small task or a significant project.

Take the example of athletes like Michael Jordan or Serena Williams. Their commitment to excellence is evident in their rigorous training regimens, relentless pursuit of perfection, and refusal to settle for mediocrity. They understand that to be the best, you must give your best effort consistently.

COMMITTED TO Embracing Discomfort

Growth and comfort do not coexist. To achieve greatness, you must be willing to embrace discomfort. This means taking on challenging tasks, facing your fears, and stepping outside your comfort zone regularly. It’s about pushing your limits and discovering your true potential.

COMMITTED TO a Growth Mindset

A growth mindset, as defined by psychologist Carol Dweck, is the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. This mindset fosters a love for learning and resilience, which are essential for great accomplishment. People with a growth mindset view challenges as opportunities to grow rather than threats to their self-esteem. This is a key aspect of dealing with, and embracing, the hard challenges in your life.

Practical Steps to Embrace Challenges

Set Big Goals: Aim high and set ambitious goals that require you to stretch beyond your current capabilities. Big goals will motivate you to put in the extra effort and face challenges head-on.
Break Down Challenges: Break down big challenges into smaller, manageable tasks. This approach makes daunting tasks more approachable and allows you to make consistent progress.
Seek Feedback: Actively seek feedback from others to identify areas for improvement. Constructive criticism can help you refine your approach and enhance your performance.
Learn from Failures: View failures as learning opportunities rather than setbacks. Analyze what went wrong, extract valuable lessons, and apply them to future endeavors.
Stay Persistent: Persistence is key to overcoming challenges. Stay committed to your goals, even when progress seems slow. Remember that persistence often outlasts resistance.

More Resources for overcoming adversity… click here.

Real-Life Examples of Overcoming Challenges

Elon Musk: The founder of SpaceX and Tesla is no stranger to challenges. From facing near-bankruptcy to enduring multiple rocket failures, Musk’s journey is a testament to the power of perseverance and resilience. His ability to learn from failures and keep pushing forward has led to groundbreaking innovations in space exploration and electric vehicles.

J.K. Rowling: Before achieving worldwide fame with the Harry Potter series, Rowling faced numerous rejections from publishers. Despite these setbacks, she continued to believe in her story and persisted in her efforts. Her success is a powerful example of how embracing hardship and staying committed to one’s vision can lead to extraordinary outcomes.

Reflecting on Your Journey

Take a moment to reflect on your own journey. What challenges have you faced, and how have they shaped you? Consider the times when you chose the harder path and the lessons you learned along the way. Acknowledge the strength and resilience you’ve developed through these experiences.

Now, think about your future goals. Are you willing to go all-in? Are you ready to embrace the difficulties that lie ahead and use them as opportunities to grow and excel? Remember, greatness is not achieved by avoiding challenges but by confronting them head-on with determination and grit.

Life is hard. Deal with it.

Life is hard, and that’s what makes it great. It’s the challenges we face and the difficulties we overcome that define our journey and shape our destiny. By embracing hardship, building resilience, and committing fully to our goals, we can outshine our competition and achieve extraordinary success.

So, the next time you encounter a difficult situation, welcome it with open arms. See it as a chance to prove your mettle, to grow stronger, and to rise above the rest. Are you all-in? The path to greatness awaits those who dare to embrace the hard road and give it their all.

Find Success After “I Can’t”

By Coach Wheeler

As a basketball coach, there’s one phrase that has always struck a nerve with me: “I can’t.”

I remember vividly the countless times I introduced a new skill or drill to a player, only to hear those dreaded words: “I can’t do it, Coach.” It felt like they were giving up before even trying, as if they had already decided failure was the only option. But over the years, I’ve come to realize something powerful: Success often lies just beyond that “I can’t.” If we can help ourselves—or others—push past that moment of doubt, there’s a whole world of growth and achievement waiting.

Let’s explore why we get stuck at “I can’t,” how to overcome it, and how to use that turning point to find success in every aspect of life.

Why “I Can’t” Feels So Real

When we say “I can’t,” it’s usually not about a true lack of ability. More often, it’s about fear, doubt, or a lack of vision.

Fear of Failure: Nobody likes to fail, especially in front of others. Saying “I can’t” is a protective mechanism. It’s easier to claim defeat upfront than to risk falling short after giving it a try.
Self-Doubt: Many people underestimate their own potential. They assume that because they haven’t done something before, they’ll never be able to.
Lack of Vision: Sometimes, people simply can’t see themselves succeeding. They can’t picture the steps or the outcome, so they shut down the idea entirely.

This is why “I can’t” often sounds like “I won’t.” It’s not that they lack the physical ability—it’s that their mindset has created a mental block.

The “Can’t Point”

I call it the “Can’t Point”: That moment when someone bumps into the edge of their comfort zone.

For a basketball player, it might be the first time they attempt a spin move or shoot a three-pointer under pressure. For someone in life, it could be learning a new skill, speaking in front of a crowd, or starting a new venture.

The “Can’t Point” is where most people stop … where they let Self Doubt keep them from moving forward.

But here’s the truth: this is where the magic happens. The “Can’t Point” is not a wall; it’s a threshold. Beyond it lies growth, success, and achievement. The challenge is getting past it.

The Role of Confidence

One of my biggest jobs as a coach is to help players see their own potential—even when they can’t see it themselves. When a player says, “I can’t,” my response is usually something like this:

“Yes, you can. I’ve seen you do tougher things before. Let’s break it down step by step. I know you’ve got this.”

It’s amazing how much of a difference confidence—whether it comes from within or from someone else—can make. A player might go from refusing to try to giving their best effort simply because I expressed my belief in them.

Here’s the takeaway for you: if you don’t believe in yourself, borrow belief from someone who does. Surround yourself with coaches, mentors, or friends who see your potential. Their confidence can bridge the gap until you develop your own.

5 Steps to Move Beyond “I Can’t”

So how do you move beyond the “Can’t Point”? It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.

1. Break It Down

Big challenges feel overwhelming because we see them as a single, massive task. Break it into smaller, manageable pieces. For example, when teaching a player to execute a spin move, I don’t just say, “Spin and score.” I break it down into footwork, hand placement, and timing.

Do the same in your own life. Want to run a marathon but feel like “I can’t”? Start with a single mile… a single walk down to the corner and back. Want to master public speaking? Begin by talking in front of a small group.

Like I say in my book, “One Step At A Time”, every great accomplishment is the result of a load of small steps, each one easy to accomplish if you just take action in the direction of your dreams.

2. Reframe the Challenge

Instead of focusing on what you can’t do, focus on what you can learn. Think of it this way… Every “I can’t” is an opportunity to either succeed or to grow. Keep trying until “you can”.

Another way to reframe the challenge is to change your mindset from “I can’t” to “I haven’t done it yet.” That small shift in language, adding the word “yet” can make a huge difference. It WILL happen. It just hasn’t happened YET.

3. Visualize Success

A lack of vision is a common reason people get stuck at “I can’t.” Maybe you “can’t” see how you could accomplish it (yet). If someone was wearing a blindfold would you say they “can’t” see? Or is there just something in the way of them seeing what needs to be done?

Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine yourself succeeding. Picture what it will look and feel like when you’ve accomplished the task. Visualization primes your brain for action and makes success feel more attainable.

4. Embrace the Struggle

Here’s the truth: it’s supposed to be hard.

Growth happens when we struggle and push through our current limites and overcome challenges. Instead of avoiding discomfort, accept it as part of the process of growing and lean into it.

Remind yourself that every time you overcome a “Can’t Point,” you’re getting stronger and more capable.

5. Take Imperfect Action

You don’t have to get it right on the first try. Most people don’t.

The key is to take action anyway. As I often tell my players, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Success is built on a foundation of attempts, failures, and adjustments.

Don’t let yourself get stuck at your “Can’t Point”.

Take Action. Any action is better than being stuck. If the results of your action turn out to be a “less than desirable outcome”, learn from it (#2-Reframe the Challenge) and try again!

A Real-Life Example… “I can’t make foul shots”

Let me share a story from my basketball coaching exploits. There was a young player I was coaching who struggled with free throws. Every time they stepped to the line in practice, they’d miss a few and mutter, “I can’t shoot free throws, Coach.”

One day, I pulled them aside and said, “What if I told you that you’re one small adjustment away from becoming the best free-throw shooter on the team? Let’s figure it out together.”

We spent extra time working on form, routine, and mindset. We settled on a simple routine for every shot. If you can make one free throw, you simply need to repeat that routine every time and you should never miss. The basket is not moving. You are standing in the same spot every time. Plus, the “free” part of free throw means that there is no one guarding you. There is no reason to ever miss a free throw, especially after you have practiced it … and practiced it … and practiced it… until it is the same every time!

I encouraged them to focus on progress, not perfection. Slowly but surely, they improved. By the end of the season, they were sinking free throws under pressure and grinning at the line.

What changed? They stopped saying “I can’t” and started saying “I’ll try.” That small shift unlocked their potential and gave them a chance to succeed every time they went to the foul line.

How You Can Use This

You don’t have to be a basketball player to apply these principles. The next time you catch yourself saying “I can’t,” pause and ask yourself a few questions:

Is it really true?
What’s one small step I can take right now?
Who can I ask for support or guidance?

Most importantly, remind yourself that “I can’t” is just a feeling, not a fact.

Success Lies Just Beyond

The phrase “I can’t” might feel like a stopping point, but in reality, it’s a starting line. Success doesn’t come from avoiding challenges; it comes from facing them head-on and refusing to quit.

As a coach, I’ve seen players go from “I can’t” to “I did it” more times than I can count. Each time, it’s a reminder of what’s possible when we push past our doubts and embrace our potential.

Remember: The moment you say “I can’t” is the moment you’re standing at the edge of greatness. Take one more step. Try one more time. That’s where success is waiting.

So, the next time you hear yourself—or someone else—say “I can’t,” smile and think: “I’m just getting started.”

Go out there and claim your success. It’s closer than you think.